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Sunday, July 24, 2011

My BDSM experience & Angry Readers

I had planned to write a totally different blog on this rainy Sunday, but with the release of Naughty Nature, things have changed. I've had angry emails and comments from readers living the lifestyle. So I felt it was time to address them and close the topic once and for all.

Here's my problem about getting angry comments and e-mail dealing with the whole BDSM club. I hid nothing from the owner or the members of the club. In no way, shape or form, did I intend to belittle, humiliate or misrepresent those involved in a true Dom/sub relationship. To those of you who'v called me a hypocrite, ignorant, or poser I ask you read the blog again. Not once did I ever claim to be an expert on the lifestyle. I merely wrote my experience, not trying to distance myself or make excuses, it was what it was and I don't feel the need to apologize. The club members and owner knew exactly who I was and why I was there. I never pretended to be anything other than a romance writer wanting to see the reality of BDSM playroom and open rooms. That night

I learned all about the trust and respect and patience which goes into forming a healthy relationship between the Dom and his/her sub. The subspace I've always heard about in reference to this type of relationship I saw for myself. There really are no words to describe the sheer perfection or peace in the sub's expression. Jealously was only one of the emotions I experienced when I gazed at the erotic yet powerful expression. The ability to trust someone so much with everything you are. I'm not talking about the whips or chains. There's something so beautiful in giving everything of yourself into another person's keeping and knowing they'll never let you down, hurt you (within reason) or ridicule you or your needs.

So why have so many people had a problem with my lighter take on the club experience? There were no accusations of abuse, no whining about people being mean or not taking no for an answer. In fact I believe I stated more than once how welcoming and respectful everyone I met was.
Is it the humor that bothers you? Me? My viewpoint? Seriously if the club members, Doms and subs alike, didn't have a problem with me, why should you?

My friends living the lifestyle, I know both Doms & subs, read my blog, laughed and moved on. They had no problem with my view on that night. In fact I sent Naughty Nature to several different people living the life. They pointed out my errors, made suggestions and said the experience would be possible if the heroine was as trouble prone as I am. In other words it could happen in another world or dimension where such a richly furnished magical club exists.

And that's my response to the angry e-mails & comments. Quit looking for insults where none exist. To everyone else I'll be back soon with another post this time a little less angry and a lot more on the lighter side.

Kudos,
Allie

2 comments:

  1. Here's a nice comment for you: Very cool blog you have here!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ahhh thanks! It's kinda like my soap/Diet Coke box. I get up, talk & hope somebody with a sense of humor is listening.
    Thanks for the support!

    ReplyDelete